10 Things I'm Not Doing Just Because Pinterest Says So
I have this phrase that I like to say when I blow it in some area.
Like recently, when I overcooked some chicken in the crockpot, by...like...10 hours, I said:
"That's okay. I'm good at enough things."
This phrase started as kind of a joke, but then a friend told me that it was her favorite phrase. That and this alternate version:
"Oh well--I can't be good at everything."
These phrases have become a mantra in my life. Not a mantra of mediocrity, though I see how they could be misconstrued that way. Not a philosophy of apathy or laziness. For me, they are a mantra for a lifestyle of grace and acceptance; of wholehearted gratitude for who I was created to be.
For me, they are a mantra for a lifestyle of grace and acceptance; of wholehearted gratitude for who I was created to be.
There are so many ways I fall short, and so many other things that just aren't my gift. I'm not going to waste my time dwelling on them. Things such as...
10 Things I'm Not Doing As A Mom Just Because Pinterest Says So
1. Screen-Free Parenting
This just isn't happening in my house and I'll admit that screen time gets a little out of hand on occasion. For example, like during the first 5 months of my twin pregnancy, or when I'm dealing with my depression. Or maybe just because it's Tuesday.
Sometimes, you just gotta say, "Elmo to the rescue."
2. Putting Down My Phone
I have a smartphone. It is my friend. Sometimes it is my only friend.
Sometimes it is the only thing that is standing between me and completely losing it on my three tiny tyrants.
I love my children. They are often quite awesome. They are also tiring and taxing and try my patience daily. It is completely illegal and immoral for me to leave them alone in order for me to get some distance from the insanity at hand. But if I can get whisked away to Facebook Fairyland for 15 minutes, long enough to simmer down after a battle of wills or just take a break from reading "Mr. Brown Can Moo" for the 50th time, so be it.
3. Feeding My Family Balanced Meals
You guys--I'm not willing to die on this hill. I want us all to be healthy, but a person can only worry about so many things. I make food, they eat it. Done and done. I shall not worry about the optimum nutrition of every bite and morsel. My brain is too small for that stuff.
4. Feeding My Family Cute Meals
I have never had the skills or experience to make adorable green food on St. Patrick's Day or heart-shaped snacks on Valentine's Day. I like learning new things, but this is not one of them. I'm just not into it. I will feed my children, do not worry, but it will not be extraordinarily artistic. It will look normal and be edible. That is all.
5. Memory-Keeping
I have not made a single scrapbook chronicling the life of my 4-year-old. Ever.
I have not completed my 2-year-old twins' baby books. Not even close.
And I do not have a super organized alternative approach. What I have is a plastic bin that I dump semi-sentimental things into for future inspection. If my kids grow up to be semi-sentimental adults, they will enjoy sifting through this bin. If not, it will collect dust, and they will not mourn the lack of my memory-keeping skills because they are not even semi-sentimental, in which case, baby books do not matter to them anyway.
6. Housekeeping
My house is clean. Enough. There are no rats or vermin. There is hardly any dust at all (most of the time). There are clean dishes to eat off of, clean clothes to wear, clean surfaces to sit on, and plenty of clean floorspace to walk or dance or play. What more do we need, really? I keep things just barely clean and tidy enough for my husband, friends, and visitors to feel comfortable and welcome. The End.
7. Active/Outdoor/Nature Stuff
Parents, can I be real? In my heart of hearts, I'm a lump on a log. I was an only child with no desire to rush or run my way through life. I gave birth to three fairly similar children who generally like to be at home or indoors. I'm not rewriting my DNA to make outdoorsy stuff a thing in this family. God made me their mom for a reason. He knew I wasn't all about camping and running and hiking, and he was still cool with me raising them so...I'm going to "run" with it. But without any actual running.
8. Homemade Essentials
I am not a mom that will be making my own soap, shampoo, laundry detergent, deodorant, makeup, sunscreen, insect repellant, or any such product. I have many friends who engage in these activities. I have great love and respect for them, just as they love and respect me and my complete disinterest in making my own stuff.
9. Holiday Specific Decorations
I did not even really know this was a thing until rather recently. I like having a cute, comfortable home. I enjoy having people over. I really enjoy celebrating things, especially holidays! But the idea of making new decorations for every holiday, or storing and rotating decorations every few weeks, gives me hives. I have a friend who has a wreath for every holiday and season. I absolutely love them. I just ain't doin' it.
10. Daily Family Devotions
I don't do anything with any kind of regularity except drink coffee. Of course, I want my kids to know Jesus, and I want his presence to pervade our home. I'm just not doing it daily with a family devotion time. That's not how my time with God looks. That's not how my husband's time with God looks either, so we don't do it as a family. -Gasp!-
You know what I am good at? I'm an awesome cuddler, silly-song singer, loud laugher, adventure finder, library lover, extravagant encourager, constant kisser, and wholehearted Jesus follower. I want to encourage my kids as individuals, to embrace their God-given differences and unique talents, so I'm starting out by embracing mine. This includes being the mom and woman God intended me to be and not beating myself up for not having skills or interests that have no bearing on eternity.
Believe me, there are plenty of areas where I could use quite a bit of work, if not a complete overhaul, but I want those to be Spirit-led--not Pinterest-pressured--improvements.
I'm pretty horrible at kind of a lot of things, and I've come to a place where I'm cool with that. It's okay. Really. I can't be good at everything.
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We don’t even have a Christmas wreath! LOL. I’m with you. Some things I’m good at – but others not. I don’t cook, I try the cleaning thing in the dark (that saves time), and even though I’m the Preschool Minister at our church, I have not ever done daily family devotions. We laugh a lot and pray a lot and talk about God whenever the opportunity presents itself (which is a lot). We hug and kiss and sing silly songs and I’m good with that. So is God :). Let’s let ourselves off the perfection hook, parents!!
Absolutely! We don’t have a Christmas wreath either, and I’m pretty sure we won’t have one for a while. Thanks for your understanding and support!
I’m glad to hear that there’s somebody out there is as busy as me and that is not as worried about doing what other people think we should be doing to be good moms. I know some days I don’t have as much patience as I should and I really do pray to God for actual patience not just things/ situations to make me so; but I also know that my children love me and they know that I love them with all my heart. Thanks for posting Marie.
You’re welcome! It’s so nice to know I’m not alone!
This is FANTASTIC! Thank you!!
Wow, thanks so much for the Post… it really blesses my soul m i feel a kind of release now. thank you jeus that am just enough just as i am n so are my family too..
Right?! My first time around the parenting block I worried a lot. This time, with my grandson, there’s more dust and lots more fun.
“I’m not willing to die on this hill” – lol!!! I enjoy your open and inviting take on motherhood and the humor in your posts. Thanks for the encouragement. It’s so nice to hear or see people keeping it real about this crazy life.
Marie can we please be friends??? I swear I could have written this myself except I have a 4yo daughter and twin two year old boys. But the rest is basically the same. I appreciate when I find other moms with the same mentality as line and it validates the things I’m scared to admit to other people in fear they will judge. Thanks for sharing and seriously email me for more info on any of your blogs. Thanks!!